Thursday, December 24, 2009, 1700 Hrs.

I’ve spent the afternoon cleaning the place up. If you guys are reading this as you’re “turning” the place trying to figure out what happened — I don’t want you guys to think I was a slob.

I loved this place!!!!!

And I made sure to wipe clean the computer history. So — save your time. There’s no porn for you to laugh and make jokes about. I know what its like to stand in a dead guys place and laugh about him.

I’m going to lay out all these red journals I’ve kept since 1973. I paid $3.50 for the 1973 journal — the 2009 journal cost $34.99 ($37.70 with tax — stuff is getting expensive!)

If you’re looking for a suicide note it can be found in the thousands of pages I’ve written in those journals to describe what happened to me during my 37-years on the job – that is — if you’re interested in reading it.

Sorry about totaling out the radio car by blowing the hole in the roof– but I’m sure the City will deduct the expense from my last check and the pension they don’t have to pay now. And I apologize for the mess – but at least I gave you guys a good story to joke about. — Hey I did that shit too.

I don’t care if there’s a funeral. The Catholic Church frowns on suicide. And most of you guys just want to avoid the subject of cops eating their guns–fearful you might catch it like the flu.

But if there’s a service, I’d like my body wrapped in my mother’s blanket laying over there on the green bean bag chair — I spent a lot of my life wrapped in it sitting there.

Then I’d like to be cremated.

And my ashes scattered in the tunnel at Kezar Stadium.

Atop Turtle Hill overlooking the Sunset District,

And at the Lands End Labyrinth overlooking the Golden Gate.

I spent the best moments of my life in those places and I’d like to spend Eternity there also. Thank you, guys. Again sorry for the mess.

There’s no next-of-kin or family to notify.